Who wins

You just killed it with the shit you said and did
And didn't say
I'm a difficult, raging, asshole
With whom it's hard to live
But I'm pretty good with routine and patterns
Hurt me
Hurt you
Whose knife digs deeper
Scar me
Scar you
Whose wounds heal faster
Who is less of a disaster
And how do you measure?
By internal or external factors?
Because that matters
As if it matters
As If there's a way to declare
Who wins